There have been plenty of times over the last 2+ years where there have been a lot of words. But in trying to write them nothing adequately conveyed both the thoughts and emotions behind them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When trying, let alone just thinking about, writing about anything else seemed to betray \u201cthe bigger thing\u201d that cast a shadow over everything else.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But here, now I can\u2019t not say something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
All journeys end. And the roads of any journey will include the unexpected. There will be times of great joy. There will be times of great sadness. But even \u201cunexpected\u201d doesn\u2019t cover others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maggie\u2019s journey ends soon. We aren\u2019t sure when. But it is far sooner than she deserves. And it is far sooner than we ever expected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On Friday we made the decision to transition her to palliative care. They will make the official change on the Monday following Easter. We wanted time for family and friends that wanted an opportunity to see her and say goodbye.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it had become clear, and the doctors confirmed, that we were no longer providing her the opportunity for recovery we had been fighting for. Her brain and her body, outside of a true miracle, would be only in a state of decline. We could continue to prolong life. But we were entering a cycle of times at home then times in the hospital fighting infections with her body slowly deteriorating with each cycle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For Lisa and I, prolonging that life would be for us, not for Maggie. Maybe it would be guilt. Maybe it would be selfishness. But it wouldn\u2019t be for Maggie. It would be us unable to let go. It wouldn\u2019t be what\u2019s best for her. Her body is telling us that its journey is ending. Medicine allows us to make that journey last longer. But in Maggie\u2019s condition there would be more times of suffering than there would be anything resembling peace. And even those days would be far different than the life Maggie would want to live.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So the decision was an easy, and heartbreaking, and impossible one. But it is the humane one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
All journeys end. Maggie deserves better. This life is full of questions we just won\u2019t get answers to. But we gave Maggie to the Lord when she was still a baby. We were just entrusted to love her in the time we had her. And we trust the Lord with her every moment we\u2019ve had with her. We cherish every moment we\u2019ve had with her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I pray we\u2019ve honored both her and the Lord. Being her father has been one of the greatest honors of my life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maggie, you\u2019ve touched so, so many lives. They will be better because of you. Some of them you\u2019ll never know in this life. You changed the world, Kid.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
There have been plenty of times over the last 2+ years where there have been a lot of words. But in trying to write them nothing adequately conveyed both the thoughts and emotions behind them. When trying, let alone just thinking about, writing about anything else seemed to betray \u201cthe bigger thing\u201d that cast a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2199","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-standalone"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2199","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2199"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2199\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2200,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2199\/revisions\/2200"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2199"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2199"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nickjenkins.me\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2199"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}